GBS...One Man's Journey

Well, I worked yesterday. It went very well. I am tired and sore today, but that is to be expected I guess. I did very well I think, as a result of my selling we sold 3.5 cases of product. The hardest part of the job is the paperwork, both and after the demo. using my hands to write is difficult, but I manage.

Two steps foward, one step back.... I had another fall Tuesday, Spent the afternoon in the E.R. It was really no big deal, although I did end up with a bruised kidney (OUCH!!!). On the bright side, I am returning to work part time. No, it's not a glamourous job, I will be handing out samples of potatoe chips at a local grocery store. It's not exactly what I imagined I would be doing at 29 years of age, but considering that I almost died a little over a year ago, I am fortunate. besides, it will give me something to do other than sit around being angry over the situation I have been placed in.

I hope, sometime soon to return to an office job, full time. For now though, this allows me to retain some measure of dignity, in that I am working and being productive.

I sign my posts on the GBS discussion boards "I refuse to let this beat me". I have to be honest, it has beat me. I have had days this last eight months where I have not and could not go on. God has gotten me through these days, He, and He alone has given me the strength to go on.

What brings on this honesty you ask? Well as I stood out in the garage today sifting through the ditritus of what used to be my life in trucking. I thought of a picture called "Footprints in the Sand" that we used to have hanging on our wall at home.

One night I dreamed I was walking along the beach with the Lord.
Many scenes from my life flashed across the sky.
In each scene I noticed footprints in the sand.
Sometimes there were two sets of footprints,
other times there was one only.
This bothered me because I noticed that during the low periods of my life,
when I was suffering from anguish,
sorrow or defeat,
I could see only one set of footprints,
so I said to the Lord,
“You promised me Lord,
that if I followed you,
you would walk with me always.
But I have noticed that during the most trying periods of my life
there has only been one set of footprints in the sand.
Why, when I needed you most, have you not been there for me?”
The Lord replied,
“The years when you have seen only one set of footprints,
my child, is when I carried you.”

From the GBS forums:

Harold K
Junior Member

Registered: Jan 2004
Location: Easley, S.C.
Posts: 12

Religious thread

I try to be a good Christian, but sometimes I have lapses in faith because I don't think about God as I should. This usually happens when I have other problems such as GBS. This is when my focus shifts from my faith.

Anyway, what I wanted to say is that since my open heart surgery several years ago and now since onset of GBS, I have thought more about my mortality, naturally. I wonder about the afterlife. It is a complete mystery to me. That may be the way God wants it, because if it wasn't a mystery, we would not need faith. I know Jesus was resurrected and went to heaven, and I know Paul said that if there is no resurrection for believers, then there is no reason for us to believe because there would be no reward.

But I just wonder what it's like. Will I recognize my father and other family and friends? There is supposedly no sorrow in heaven, so will I not miss the family and friends that I leave behind on earth? I believe there is an afterlife, but don't have a clue what it's like. And I think about it a lot.

Would some of you who have a faith stronger than mine, who may be closer to the Lord or understand these things more please post what your ideas on heaven and the afterlife are. Thanks in advance.

Oh death, where is thy sting?

Harold K.

Good questions Harold. I to wonder what it will be like, I do no one thing. God promises us there will be no more pain, tears, or sorrow. Boy, I look foward to going home!!


Rev. 21:4

He will wipe away every tear from their eyes. There will be no more death or mourning or crying or pain, for the old order of things has passed away.

A friend of mine made quite possibly the most difficult decision of her life yesterday. She discontinued life support for her husband. I don't know all of the ins and outs of the situation. He will be greatly missed, and my prayers go out to his family.

Well, I made it through the 1 year anniversary... barely..... To sasy the least, I have been a little preoccupied by the events of last year the last couple of days. I thought I would take some time to catch up the blog tonight.

I have done a lot of research on GBS over the last 6 months, and find it extrememly disturbing that there is not more research being done on this dibilitating syndrome. The folks at Guillain-Barre Syndrome Foundation International are doing what they can, but it is hard to compete with the publicity that diseases like cancer and AIDS get. I would encourage each and every one of you, wheather you know someone with GBS or not, to ask NIH (National Institutes' for Health), CDC (Centers for Disease Control), and your local universities to research GBS. There are still many things we don't know about GBS.

Today is the 1 yr. anniversary of my attack of GBS. Ahhh. bitter sweet. Here is another article from Britan that explains what those days were like.